Top 5: Worst Pick-Up Lines
November 11th, 2005
Hey, pick-up lines have their place. But do they need to be this ridiculous? All of the following are ones I have either had directed at me, or at a friend I was with. It’s appalling.
5. The Complete-Lack-of-Originality Line: For Halloween one year, Emily & I dressed up as devils. Multiple - multiple - guys responded to this by saying, “Are you girls devils? Then D*MN do I want to go to hell!” Real original, fools.
4. The “Are You Kidding Me?” Line: While visiting some friends at a different college, this guy started hitting on Em, saying, “So… where are you staying tonight? Cuz… you know… I have a bed. A big bed. I’d share with you.” I immediately fell off my chair laughing. Literally.
3. The Completely Idiotic Line: Again, with Emily, this time at a bar in Boston. Some drunk fool is hitting on Emily, and I, being in a crappy mood, am horrified that he’s anywhere near us. Plus, his idiot wingman is trying to talk to me about something stupid and boring. I hear the drunk segue from telling Em he likes her hair to asking, “I like the gap in your front teeth. It’s sexy. Did you have that put in?” Who even thinks this? Scarred by his stupidity, we fled to the safety of the bathroom.
2. The Borderline (or not so borderline) Racist Line: I have had way too many guys start conversations with me by asking if I’m Asian. While this is annoying, I can usually laugh it off. However, one guy responded to me by saying, “Don’t lie to me, girl. I know you know how to make fried rice.” Jack*ss.
* As an addition to this category, a friend of mine was recently asked, “Are you black? Really? What kind? Like, African or Regular?” I swear I’m not making this up.
1. The Insulting Lines: Three weeks ago, I had a guy approach me, talk normally for a minute, then tell me that I’d look better if I did something with my hair. To which I responded, “Well, you don’t have to look at it” before I walked away. What is with this new approach? I’ve read about it all over the place, and I’m horrified that there are girls out there that fall for this crap.
What? I hadn’t heard of the insult line approach. What’s the hook — that the guy supposedly has the answer to, say, what’s wrong with her hair? Pick-up lines are usually just clumsy or lame attempts at humor, but I can’t figure this one out at all.
maxwell caulfield
Jason - apparently the logic is that hot girls are used to guys falling all over themselves to compliment them. By insulting them, you can get their attention by being different. Also, by playing on their insecurities, you can make them feel like they’re lucky that you’re paying attention.
It’s basically playing up to the old “girls like *ssholes” idea. To which I say - who the hell wants a girl that likes being treated like sh*t? I don’t get it.
“heeeeeeeeeeey. lets get hammered! kiddakhuree@hotmail.com”
thats gotta be the worst chat up line i ever heard.
actually, i went upto this fine lookin fella, and said, “are you jamaican?…because jamican me crazy”
yes, im gay, but i’ll swing both ways. there’s enough of me to go round…literally. im a big boy hustla gangsta!
gay represent!!
p.s. yes…that IS my real email address. im hot and looking for candy floss, baby….*wink wink, bum, bum*
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