Always Anna

I’ve been accused lately of being too judgemental. Not in real life - in real life, I’m pretty nice. No, I’m too mean and harsh about celebrities.

While I’m not as clever as some other girls, I have a tendency to spew venom at the TV, or magazine, or website that carries celeb news. Quite frankly, I am just tired of seeing tacky and talentless people shown as the height of cool.

Celebrities are supposed to be the people that we look up to; they are supposed to be the people that we want to be like. But instead of having classy, cool, interesting people in the spotlight, I feel like all I see are train wrecks that make me want to throw up. Instead of thinking, “Wow, so-and-so is so cool,” all I ever think nowadays is, “Are you freakin’ kidding me? What the h*ll is wrong with these people?” No one seems to care about how they present themselves, or think about what comes out of their mouths. I miss “old Hollywood” - the days when stars were glamourous and sophisticated; when famous people were seen as people to look up to and admire.

We used to have Marilyn Monroe - a sexy, stunning, talented star. She made great films, lit up the screen, and kicked off Playboy magazine. But even with her string of marriages, nude photos, and personal issues, she always came across in public as a woman with style and charm. Contrast that with Paris Hilton - today’s version of a sexy blonde star. She can’t sing, she can’t act - she can’t even model well. She comes across as a trampy, dumb bimbo that doesn’t have a single attribute worth extolling. And she looks like her chihuahua! So why’s she famous? Why is she taking up space on TV and in magazines and online? Why does she get a TV show (which isn’t even entertaining), when there’s surely something better to put on there?

I’ve run out of patience, so here’s my plea:

TV: Stop throwing stupid reality shows, with their lame contestants at me. Original or interesting reality shows, such as “Project Runway,” “Trading Spaces,” even “Beauty and the Geek” are fine. But do we need 25 different “dump a guy/girl” shows? Do we need ANY reality show that involves plastic surgery? PLEASE show some creativity, revive the sitcom, do something to provide me with real stars.

Music: Stop churning out crappy musicians. I know you’re having trouble adjusting to the digital era, but here’s a hint - stop investing your money in talentless, computer-generated “singers” (especially ones that are really actors/models) that think mismatched clothes and too much eye make-up mean that they’re artistic. Sign some of the truly talented musicians/singers that are out there (I know they exist), so that I can read about interesting, cool, cutting-edge celebrities.

Movies: STOP GIVING FILM ROLES TO PEOPLE THAT CAN’T ACT. For a reminder of what a bad idea this is, see Fair Game. There are a million talented actors out there that would do a much better job, and would probably cost you less money. You wonder why you’re having trouble making money on your films? No one wants to pay $10 to see bad acting.

And finally, famous people: Stop talking just to hear your own voice - If you don’t know what to say, don’t say anything (you’ll seem mysterious). Wearing pasties and hot pants doesn’t make you seem sexy, it makes you seem desperate - leave something to my imagination. If you don’t know how to dress, hire a stylist, or copy someone whose look you admire. This does not include horrifying trends such as Mary-Kate’s homeless-chic. And for god’s sake, stop overexposing yourself - I don’t need your name on my clothes, make-up, perfume, etc.