Always Anna

In spite of the fact that I had to come to work an hour early this morning, I was in a pretty good mood on my walk in. Today has gorgeous weather, and I have on such a cute spring outfit - it’s hard to fight when that’s the case. But then, as I entered Downtown Crossing, the crazy homeless guy accosted me.

This guy is CRAZY. He wanders around the area between the Park Street and Downtown Crossing T-stops, yelling at the top of his lungs, “Got any spare change? ANYONE got any spare change?” Add to this the facts that his voice sounds like a person from an anti-smoking commercial (you know, that has to talk through one of those robotic voice boxes), and he waves his arms around like a freakin’ windmill, and you get a pretty scary guy. I’ve always managed to avoid him (and since I always give all my change to Michael, I don’t feel bad), but this morning he got up in my face and asked, “Can I walk with you?”

I was a little weirded out, but didn’t want to be a bitch, so I just smiled and half-nodded. Here’s our conversation:

Are you married?
No. (Half smile)
Do you gotta boyfriend?
Yup.
Do you live with him?
Yeah.
So you get lots of sex then.
(I look at him in horror)
I know you do, with those big titties. (He rambles on for a minute about my body, while getting closer and closer to me)
(I regain my faculties, and look at him with horror) Are you fucking kidding me?

At this point, some guy in a business suit hears what’s going on, and comes over and yells at the guy to get away from me. The crazy man wanders away, and the business man asks if I’m okay, to which I mutely nod yes. Then I think to thank him for his help.

Okay, I know he was crazy, and I keep trying to get it out of my mind. But I feel so dirty now. Ugh. Hopefully I can avoid him tomorrow.